What the Italians really say with their hands

   Moving to Italy from Denmark means a lot of getting used to. 

I need to get used to the fact, that time is a fluffy thing here. It is more or less an individual opinion what time it is. For instance is the time schedule for the bus indicative, not a guideline. It means that it doesn't actually show when the bus arrives, but it shows that eventually maybe a bus will arrive at that bus stop.
   I also need to get used to the social interactions, which are a lot more casual. A meeting with friends doesn't have to be an all-day thing, but it can be a ten minutes meeting just for a coffee. But mainly, I need to get used to the language. And then, the second language here: The gestures.

   I have come so far than to understand that an Italian gesture can do one of the following: It can emphasize what is being said. Or it can stress what is the most important point in the conversation. Or it can be a sentence all in its own. Watch out for a hand being thrown out in stretched arm. This gesture doesn't come with a lot of words (not nice ones anyway) and I am pretty sure it’s function is to cast an evil spell on who ever is in the receiving end. But most other gestures is merely reinforcing what is already being said. That's why, for some time, I tried to focus more on decoding what the hands were saying, more than what the words meant, hoping that it would give me a winning chance of being part of an Italian conversation. 

  But I have had quite a bit of confusion regarding the gestures. First time I was gestured a pointed finger to the eye, I thought I had something in the eye and quickly went to the bathroom to check my makeup. But it actually means “pay attention”. The same with the rotating finger on the chin. It doesn't mean that you've spilled sauce in the corner of your mouth, it means “Did it taste good?” or “Delicious”. Spared me a trip to the mirror getting to know that one.

   The day I truly realized how functional the Italian gestures are, was a day at the beach. I am out deep in the water swimming with my boyfriend when a friend is gesturing something from land. I wanted to swim back to land to find out what they were saying, but my boyfriend turned to me and said “They are just going go get some lunch, they’ll be back in fifteen minutes”. That was the translation of the gesturing from land. Coolest thing ever, right!? I mean, why do they even need the language, when they can have a conversation with their hands? 

    The amount of different gesturing makes me realize, however, that I may one day be able to speak the language. But my stupid steady hands will always reveal that I am a foreigner. Because not only are the Italian gestures a language in it self. But depending on where you are in Italy, there is a great variation of how much or how little the gestures are used. I know from dependable sources that they are kind of stiff in Bologna for example. And in the south, the gestures are way more flamboyant, which I think you need some sort of acting class to imitate. Where I am, in the center belt of Italy there is a lot of confusing gestures that I don't know how, or when to use. I still don’t know what the triangle during a conversation means, but I've noticed that it is used during complaining situations. It’s a triangle of complaints! And I wonder what I might have said with my hands in moments of frustration.   

   Being a nation with exaggerated explicit communication, I wonder how often misunderstandings has occurred in Italy. I mean, Italians wave their arms left and right, up and down and around the face. Even to the person they speak with on the phone! To me, it seems like half the communication is through the gestures, so how much of the conversation is lost through the phone? “I gestured that you talk to much and yet you just keep talking and talking!”

  But for now, my hands and I are gesturing thank you for following my blog. Next I’ll explore what it is like to work in Italy.

If you want to learn more about the wonders of Italian gestures, check this out. 

Italians and their romantic ideals

   As I promised when I first started this blog, I did set a few prospects in sight when I left the cold north in order to explore the exotic south. One of them was that I wanted to know how the Italians themselves look at the future of Italy.

   Because, while the rest of the world is pointing their fingers at Italy, with your economy gone wild, your horny politicians who is more interested in getting laid than actually running politics and you brutally high level of unemployment among young people, Italy still remains. To the rest of the world Italy is a sinking ship where even the captain jump off board as the first (to soon?). But while the world is laughing, how do Italians look at their country?

   I experienced firsthand the general misbelieve there is to the country, when I told people that I wanted to live there. “You must be either blindly naive or damn stupid if you think you can just go there and jump first in line for a job.” That was the general reaction. Even from Italians I got the question: Why would I want to move to a country where almost half the people are fighting to get a job? And those who got a job, are working under unacceptable terms because the power between supply and demand is completely unbalanced in favor of the employer. The first reason is that yes, I am probably naive and seduced by the warm climate and friendly people, but secondly, here is why I really want to live here:

   What separate Italians from complete disaster and what I believe eventually will turn this country back on track is the level of unlimited love for their country. Italians love their country even more than the Americans love deep fried stuff (and that’s a lot). This quickly becomes clear when you have spent some time there. Even if the economy is completely fucked (there, I said it) and the political regime is a money sucking machine that gives to the rich and takes from the poor. Even then, this has not changed the fact that Italians still believe that things can turn. I see two general reactions when I talk to Italians here about the future of Italy. One is the people that makes a large and forgiving gesture with the hands and tell me that Italy will be fine: We will find a way, people will fight, and there are still jobs to be created. The second is the people that still think things might turn at some point, but they have left the country until that day comes. These people I like the most, because they don’t feel that they in any way have left the sinking boat by working in another country. They are not really “cheating” on Italy, they feel. They are just bringing money from another country into Italy. And common to them all is that they all want to move back one day.
   That sort of patriotism I only see in Denmark when some guys have the nerves to burn our flag or if people don’t want to eat hour meat balls or drink our “snaps” (hard liquor that tastes like death and fire). Other than that, we piss on our country, literally. We don’t love everything about it, the way Italians do and I am pretty sure if the economic situation were the same in Denmark we’d all emigrate. Probably to Italy. That would run out of pasta and wine in two weeks.

   In conclusion, the dead serious believe in a country that is hanging in the balance is something I want to experience firsthand. I want to be here when things turn for the better, but even if it doesn't I’d rather be in a country with real problems that a country where the biggest problem is that a giraffe was put down due to regulations.

Next off: What the Italians really say with their hands

Eat your way through Abruzzo

   People explore new territory in different ways. Some, prefer walking around, seeing historical sights or spending hours learning about the treasures of the country through a glass montra in museums (not judging at all..). Others, take the easy solution and jump on a red bus with a talkative guide and take blurry pictures while driving around the city. Me, I prefer tasting the new area. Ask me about any country I have been in, and I might not be able to tell you where the most common sights would be, or what the particular trademark for that city is. But I sure can tell you what you should eat when you are in that city! In Berlin you have to taste the currywurst or their big pretzels. In Athens the moussaka and olives are to die for. In Montreal their pulled pork melts in your mouth. In Oslo they make a delicious whale-steak. And if you ever find yourself at the big square in Prague, there is a place with an apple pie that you wouldn't believe. 

   In Abruzzo there is, in particular one place that you have to explore. If you are a vegetarian, this would be your absolute nightmare, but for a carnivore like me, this was f** awesome. High up in the mountains, in a small place called "Zaff", located in the area of San Giovanni Teatino, there is a restaurant which specialize themselves in the art of arrosticini. Lamb meat on a stick. The meat there is the freshest meat you will ever try. And here is why: When you get there and step out of the car, you will hear “baah..baahh” somewhere in the distance, and you think to yourself, "oh they have lambs here". And it is not until twenty minutes later, when you chew into the first bite of juicy barbecued meat that you realize just how fresh the meat is. You just ate the lamb going “baah.”
   It is, by far, the best lamb I have ever tasted. And it is so in my style of eating (no small pretentious portions of no food). First, you get a variation of starters, mainly bread with olive oil, sausages, eggs, tomatoes, eggplant and some other stuff dipped in delicious. And a pitcher of beer to go with it, of course. Let the meat-fest begin! The lamb is served in portions of 50 sticks at a time – so you get a bunch of those, and then some more. If you want to fit in with the locals (and you do) you don’t eat the meat with a fork, you eat the flesh directly off the stick. But not before you have rolled the stick over a slice of bread, to get the juices on the bread. It is nothing less than Abruzzo art.

  The most well known expression of Abruzzeses’ love for food, is the annual festivals called Sagre. They take place during the summer, usually august, and each Sagre have their own food-theme. But the general purpose is: Eat as much as you can. I have been to the big Christmas dinner on the 25th where you already need two stomachs, so when I went to my first Sagre I thought I'd seen it all. Boy, was I wrong! Now I know that, the 25th is for babies. These festivals are for the elite. It is simply heaven if you like to eat Italian food. And come, on who doesn't? A sagre can last for days, and it usually happens outdoors where tables are set up and often there will be a local band performing the dinner music. Needles to say that the atmosphere is absolutely wonderful. Here you will find all of the best specialties from the area - and given, there is a lot of pasta. Personally, my favorite was pasta with pistachio nuts. But you will also find other things. Everything from starters, to main courses and of course desserts. In short – if you want to fall in love with Abruzzo, this is the place to be.

  
   However there is one kind of meal that, to me, beats everything I have ever tried. And this is a simple one. It is the meal you get when you are invited home to an Italian family. The occasion can be anything from a birthday to a football game (the difference being the amount of yelling at the TV) but here you will experience the true essence of Italian dining. The starters of cheese, thin sliced ham, mozzarella made from buffalo milk, tomato salad with fresh basil leaves, things with vinegar and things that you just want to dip your face into. And then comes the pasta, cooked al dente, of course, or a risotto made with mushroom or white wine. But whatever it is, the taste, in combination with the warmth of the Italian family, simply makes one absolutely epic meal, that cannot be found anywhere else in the world. And that is how you should eat your way through Abruzzo.

Next off: Italians and their romantic ideals

 

How to make friends with Italians

   One thing that has been of my concern before moving to Italy, is how easy it will be to make new friends. Especially because I first of all will be moving to a small city, on the east coast called Pescara. 

That's me sitting right there in the corner, checking out the street artists

  In small cities there, like Pescara, there tend to be a similar tendency amongst the people there, to be a bit reluctant. It makes sense, really, when you grow up in a small city where you go to school with the same 20 people you went to kindergarten with, then you tend to become a bit – let’s call it shy – to meet new people. And when the new people speak a foreign language it becomes very much a challenge it seems. At least that has been my experience so far.

  It was a bit surprising to me I admit; because where ever I have traveled people have always been able to at least speak English. So when I have been visiting Pescara I had to get used to being “that person” that nobody wants to sit next to at the table, because, what if I started a conversation with them and they had to speak English. I understand them, because everything in Italy is in Italian. Even the American TV-shows are dubbed (Seriously hard to get used to The Simpsons intro song in Italian) so I don’t blame people for not speaking English well. But that doesn't make it less hard to be the alien among them.
So my first advice on getting friends in Italy would be this: Start learning Italian!

   The trick I have learned how ever is that with Italians, I just have to go about it in a different way. Because, really, Italians are very social and curious people. You just have to adjust the expectations a little. But once you have gotten to know a few people, you will undoubtedly soon find yourself in a larger group of people. And then it’s all about putting on your friendliest smile, and work on that Italian opening line you have memorized.

  You just have to forgive people for not feeling comfortable with you, because you are a non-Italian person. Because if you have never moved some place new where you had to make new friends (or be lonely with your cup-noodles every night) you can’t be blamed for not knowing what it’s like. But some of the most rewarding friendships I have ever had, has been when I have lived abroad.  And I love knowing that I have friends all over the world, that one day I will come visit again. So it is hard for me to understand why people don’t feel the need to get to know new people, from different countries.

   Of course I understand though, that in a city like Pescara, the foreigners you will meet are tourists, that will eventually leave. So why make friends right? To me a friendship can be short or long lasting, but still valuable because you never know what kind of influence this person can have on your life. I have met people for ten minutes that could have still had an impact on me.

One last thing, if you are a girl trying to make friends with other girls in Italy: keep in mind that topics of appropriate conversations are: Makeup, nails, dresses, hair, weddings, food and travels. As a down to earth, beer drinking, pervert-humored kind of girl I really had to work on my feminine skills in order to make friends with the women. Italian women are a lot more feminine minded than I am used to (don’t make anal jokes at the dinner table, just saying). And a lot more focused on the feminine aspects of life. So first of, when greeting the women, throw in a compliment, then move on to neutral topics of conversations. At least until you get to know them.

Next off: Eat your way though Abruzzo